She’s Not Talking Yet! (And I couldn’t give a hoot!)
Jul 17
Lucy is 22 months old. She is on the very brink of being a “talker”. She has quite a few words that she says with ease – Mama, Dadda, bubble, pool, bot-bot (yay for big brother huh?). But she’s not “talking” as such.
And in typical last baby fashion, I am embracing every last moment of her “non-verbalness”. I know that this is yet again a last moment of babydom, that once it has gone, it is gone forever, and I am reminded that my toddler will soon become a little girl.
So right now I am making the most of how she communicates with her entire body. There is so much joy and passion that comes from having to make yourself heard without words. One of the more obvious signs is tantrums because non-verbal children get so frustrated by not being able to say what they are feeling. I have signed with all my babies in an attempt to ease this frustration. I never leaned any formal sign language nor took any courses, and in hindsight I’ve probably used different sign for different babies. But like most things, we just bumbled along until we found a mutual language that we both understand.
Because she is older and because she has so much she wants to say, Lucy has an incredible signing vocabulary. I was trying to do a mental-list of everything she signs for and was amazed at how much she knows. For example she can ask for milk, or water, or for something to eat. She can tell me if she is hot or cold, when she wants a cuddle, or wants to be held. She can tell me if someone is sleeping and if we should be quiet. She can tell me about her day and if she fell over and whether she hurt herself, and how she did it (these make me laugh because she just about re-creates the entire scene which of course often leads her to do the exact thing that hurt her, again!). She can ask for “just one more”, she can count to 10, she can say stop I don’t it I don’t like it.
She can tell me if it’s raining or sunny, she giggles when we she tells me about splashing in puddles, or the pool or the beach. She asks her brothers and sisters if she can carry their bag, or their hat or their drink bottle. She tells me that she loves me (and tells her dolls the same thing). She can express her like (or dislike) for the meals I put in front of her and she has beautiful manners with please and thank-you. She tells me if she is sad, or tired, or hurt, or scared. She can give me the thumbs up if something is great and she throws her hands in the air with joy if we ask her “who wants to do something fun?”. She says sorry if she hurts someone, and brings me books when she wants me to read to her.
There are so many ways that she can express her feelings, her thoughts and ideas. I feel like it is such a pure and wonderful way for her to communicate with us. She is not limited by words. She doesn’t have to search for the perfect expression to convey her emotions – she just IS that emotion. Her energy, her joy, her light fills the room. And her cheekiness, and her terrible-twoness, leaves me rushed off my feet and exhausted and exhilarated.
But I love it – every single moment of it.
And I love her with every ounce of my body.
So I’m happy to wait a little longer for her to talk. At the moment I am savouring the babyness and spirit of my non-talker for as long as I can.
**** Please note: All children are different and develop at different rates, so don’t be overly concerned if your toddler is acquiring new skills at a different rate to those around him. But if you are worried about his development or it seems to have stalled or be going backwards, talk to a health professional. You can see more about Language Development for 1-2 Year Olds HERE ***
Truly scrumptious – so much joy!!
Thanks Kim
Thankyou so much for sharing this. My daughter is 15 months and doesn’t say as much as she should and I was starting to worry. She knows what she wants and points to it, an if I ask her to get something she can but she won’t talk. After reading your blog I feel relieved and won’t be worrying anymore. Thankyou for sharing and making me realist I just need to see the good in things.
It’s so hard Mandy. There are so many milestones and it can be hard to know whether our children fit into the “normal” category. But thankfully we know that they all develop at different rates, and as long as you aren’t worried about something in particular (in which case you might need to talk to someone), then it’s nice to sit back and let them do things in their own time.
Lucy is just gorgeous! My boy will be 3 in just a few weeks and I remember that age and stage sooo well. He was a ‘non-talker’ and there were times I was concerned, but I trusted my instincts and knew he was fine. After all, he had a big sister to do most of the talking, and we just knew what he wanted. He didn’t really start talking until a few months ago. As someone pointed out recently he has ‘swallowed a dictionary’ since March!
Haha – swallowed a dictionary! I like that!
Thank you Mummy Smiles, another wonderful & delightful post!
P.S: My patents didn’t know my middle brother could talk until he was almost 3, purely because he had two older siblings & one younger who did ALL the talking!! He still doesn’t say much but when he does, it’s profound & wise!
Thanks Em! I think that is probably the case with Lucy too! Maddy just about came out talking so it’s rare for anyone else to get a word in! I love that his words are profound and wise – I wonder if Lucy will be the same!
That’s a really refreshing & lovely way to look at it! As modern mums that read so much about children & parenting we so often get caught up in what they should be doing & stress when they don’t meet certain milestones.
Thanks Rachelle. It’s so hard not to worry about every little step, but possibly there is some magic in the “last baby” that makes us take off our worry hat for a little while
I signed with both my girls and because my first was slow to speak people blamed the signing. However, I signed with number 2 and she has just turned two and speaks in full sentences. I agree with you kids develop differently and we need to relax and enjoy each stage. My eldest is three and a half and she is still quiet and prefers not to speak if she can get away with it. It is a personality thing as she can now speak perfectly well.
Hey Lisa that’s a great point. I hadn’t thought a lot about personality and you’re right. Not every adult likes to talk all the time and there’s no reason that children should be any different.